Why do these people have more dates? 7 reasons

Ever wonder why some people are just so likeable—on dates, at parties, or, honestly, anywhere? It’s like they have some kind of charm superpower. But here’s the kicker: they’re not even trying. They’re just effortlessly being themselves.

After 30+ years of working with all sorts of people as a dating coach and relationship expert—teachers, lawyers, sales pros, NFL players (don’t ask, it just happened), writers, firefighters—you name it, I’ve cracked the code. It’s not their job that makes them likeable.

It’s these traits that turn their charm dial up to 11:

1. They say what’s on their mind

   
   

   No filters, but not in a rude way. They’ll casually drop a comment that’s unexpected and a little quirky. It’s interesting! It’s surprising! It’s the stuff confidence is made of—and let’s be real, confidence is hot.

   
   
   
   

2. They’re gloriously imperfect

   
   

   They mess up, they laugh, they move on. No big deal. They’re not trying to be polished 24/7, and that’s what makes them so refreshingly human.

   
   
   
   

3. They’re pros at boundaries

   
   

   You won’t catch them saying “yes” to everything just to please people. They’ll politely decline an invite, skip the FOMO theatrics, and keep it real—always with a touch of class.

   
   
   
   

4. They’re cool with not knowing stuff

   
   

   When they don’t know something, they’ll just ask. No big deal. No ego. They’re the “no such thing as a dumb question” champions, and it’s totally endearing.

   
   
   
   

5. They’re predictably unpredictable

   
   

   Out of nowhere, they’ll say something completely off-topic or toss in a witty comment that catches everyone off guard. It’s charming, not chaotic, and it makes you want to keep listening.

   
   
   
   

6. They don’t fear silence

   
   

   Awkward pauses? Not a problem. They’ll let the quiet moments breathe, and somehow, that makes them even cooler.

   
   
   
   

7. They listen like pros

   
   

   They’re not about hogging the mic. They’ll happily hand over the spotlight, genuinely listen, and drop thoughtful gems when it’s their turn.

   
   

So, what’s the secret to being likeable? Turns out, it’s not about being perfect—it’s about being real, fun, and unapologetically you.

Which of these do you totally rock? Or better yet, which do you want to start owning?

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